Dear SWL/Spank with love
A Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, asking our Lord for many happy returns for us all.
Thank You very much for clarifying this issue for me. I found the information in
the e-mail you sent me extremely helpful. I am a very religious christian person.
I pray a lot. That is why i found the experiences surfacing within me very difficult
at first. but your e-mail made things more calm and bearable. I will take your
advice with the cautions it contained into deep consideration.
Allow me to once again show a lot of appreciation for the informaiton contained in
your website and hope that it will be a safe guidance for all parents. however i do
ask you to bridge your website to the majority of parents in the middle east and
for one good reason. a lot of parents in our area simply and blindly immitate the
discipline ways they received from their parents. in the past, our area was very
primitive in their views on correct discipline. a mistake would encourage a mother
or father to just welt their children with a leather belt or stick regardless of the
pain they subject their children to or to number of blows. up till now a days,
rearing up children and discipline in the middle east gets very quickly corrolated
in the mind of the parents with the belt.
I firmly believe that discipline doesn't have to be corrolated with violence. even
spanking your children for any mistake done doesn't have to be in a violent way.
the punishment probably should hurt and be correcting but it doesn't have to be
violent or with violent implements such as the belt. Parents are a source of passion
and comfort for their children. when a child suddenly sees his or her parent hurting
them its sometimes confusing and hard. That is why the child has to know why he/her
is punished and for what purpose and in a non violent way. a parent should always
remember that at punshiment time he or she is infliciting massive pain on the child.
It has to be done effectively after a thorough explanation and with love, away from
any violent behavior that might cause difficult feelings to errupt within a child.
from the age of 8 till 15, i was punished four times with the belt by my mother. My
mother was the person that punished me and my siblings in the house. She used the
leather belt well on us when she had to. I resented the belt because it literaly
torchered me. At one instant one of the lashes caused a deep burn on my thigh and
caused an area of about six centimeters on my thigh skin to wrinkle. the number of
lashs would sometimes reach 20. She would use it on our behind and legs. However what
made it bearable was the fact that she was a person that flooded us with a lot of
beautiful sentiments. She was a very good example of a mother. we love her and literaly
adore her. before or after the beating she would explain to us why she gave it to us.
as i said i resented the tool and not the idea. today we are mature people that
underwent discipline in our childhood by understanding aware parents and no harm was
i greatly hope that awareness be spread in our society between propper punishment and
violent punishement. a strict mom in the middle east that wants to rear up her children
should understand that if she wants to be strict and discipline her children she
doesn't have to put them to torture. leather belts, crops and excessive pain tools
shouldn't be used. I believe the hand, slipper with a leather sole or wooden paddle
(paddles i believe are designed to hurt but not to leve excessive welts) are good
tools, when there be need to use them. I do believe that the sole purpose of child
rearing is to help children grow up and mature them as balanced adults away from any
torturing experiences that they may have to live with for the remainder of their
lives. the human mind is not like a computer, with one touch on the delete button
anything can be erased from our minds. it stays there. I call on all parents globaly
to remember that they have to supervise thier children untill they reach the harbor
of maturity where they can pilot safely on their own in their life and be balanced
parents in return.
Thank You again and hope that the blessings of christmas touch everyone of us.